A Letter from a Betrayed Wife: Finding Healing and Hope After Infidelity

This is one of several letters written by women who have experienced betrayal in their marriages. Through their stories, they share the reasons that led them to either stay or leave after facing infidelity.

If you are grappling with the same dilemma, know you are not alone. Many betrayed wives have gone through this difficult decision-making process. By reading these letters, you can gain insight and inspiration for navigating your own journey.

Should I Stay or Should I Leave After Infidelity?

If you are struggling with the question, should I stay or leave after infidelity, know that you're not alone and that there is hope for healing after infidelity. In this letter, a fellow betrayed wife shares her journey of finding peace and making the best decision for her life after experiencing the trauma of infidelity. She says that with guidance and support, you can emerge from this experience even stronger and more resilient. 

Leaving a marriage can be a difficult and emotional question for anyone, but it can be especially challenging for wives who have experienced infidelity. The feelings of hurt, anger, guilt, and fear that often accompany a separation or divorce can be magnified by the trauma of the betrayal, making the decision process even more complex. 

Moreover, the realities of co-parenting and adjusting to a new life as a single parent, combined with the feelings of loss, trust issues, and the need to rebuild one's sense of self, can be overwhelming. These challenges can be even more pronounced for betrayed wives who are financially or emotionally dependent on their partner. Although the journey ahead may be difficult, it is essential to remember that healing and growth are possible and that support is available.

The One-Year After Infidelity Challenge

As you read this betrayed wife's letter, you may find yourself in a familiar place one year after discovering infidelity. The one-year mark can be a challenging time, filled with intense emotions and difficult moments. It may bring back painful memories and make you question everything that has happened in the past.

The one-year anniversary of discovering infidelity marks the passage of time since the traumatic event, bringing up painful emotions and memories. It may also be a reminder of the relationship's struggles, unfulfilled expectations, and the difficult decisions that have to be made. 

Additionally, the year-mark may highlight the progress or lack thereof in the healing process, causing feelings of disappointment or frustration. This can all lead to feelings of grief, sadness, and uncertainty about the future, making the one-year anniversary a challenging time for betrayed wives.

The writer of this letter knows this all too well, as she also experienced the same challenges at the one-year mark...

Lacy's Letter

Dear fellow betrayed wife,

If you're reading this, you likely understand the pain and confusion of infidelity all too well. I want you to know that you're not alone and that there is hope for healing and recovery.

As someone who has been through the trauma of infidelity, I understand the intense emotions that come with it. I know how easy it can be to feel overwhelmed, angry, and lost. But I also know that with the right support, it's possible to find peace and start to rebuild your life.

That's why I want to share my story with you and offer encouragement as you navigate your own journey. I won't sugarcoat it - the road to healing is a difficult one, but it's worth it. With the proper guidance and support, you can emerge from this experience even stronger and more resilient.

Deciding to get divorced wasn't my first choice, but after exhausting all options, it was the one I was left with. 

To provide some background, after discovering the affair, I filed for divorce (within a week, not that I recommend it). But research and time showed me couples could rebuild relationships after affairs. It is possible ...there was hope. 

I wasn't dependent on my husband financially or really in any way. However, I loved him; I have a child with him and had dreams of a future with him. I never wanted to get divorced. So we tried therapy, research, and dedicated time together. (Really, I tried. He admits now that he didn't try.) But time has a way of revealing truths, and I had done a lot of work with The Betrayed Wife on rebuilding myself!

We were at the one-year mark, the hardest time. I expected it to be bad, and it didn't disappoint. He began choosing unhealthy behaviors, stopped going to therapy, lied to me, isolated himself, numbed with alcohol and video games, punished me for triggers, and made decisions without including me. Yet I still made excuses for him.

The Betrayed Wife put me in contact with a fellow betrayed wife who had been through a similar situation as me. Talking with this betrayed wife gave me the perspective I needed; I saw that I was being a good victim.  I didn't see myself that way, until this betrayed wife shared her story... she'd been there. It was time to stop making excuses.

While my husband was away on a  two-week work trip, I found life really wasn't any harder without him. It was actually less stressful.

I knew then that our marriage was over. It was a decision made from a secure, safe place. I still didn't want it, but there were things I didn't want even more...for my daughter to grow up thinking our relationship was normal and for this to be my happily ever after. It wasn't happy at all.

 I realized that I deserved better and that my daughter deserved to grow up in a healthy environment.

All the pieces came together. When he got home, we decided it was over. The next few weeks were excruciating (he'd come and go as he pleased), but eventually, he moved out. There were ups and downs along the way, but we are officially divorced.

In my own journey, I found immense support and healing through the work I did with The Betrayed Wife. This amazing woman is a resource who offers self-care after infidelity courses and live coaching as someone who has been in your shoes, and truly understands what you're going through. I cannot recommend her coaching and courses enough.

The divorce process was not easy, but I am proud of the woman I am becoming through this journey. I would like to extend my gratitude to The Betrayed Wife for being a source of support and guidance throughout this difficult time. Only those who have experienced betrayal can truly understand what a betrayed wife goes through.

So, my dear fellow betrayed wife, I encourage you to take the first step toward healing. Sign up for the self-care after infidelity course and book a free call with The Betrayed Wife. You don’t have to do this alone and there is hope for healing and a brighter future. Mine looks better every day!




Are you struggling?

Are you struggling to come to terms with the pain and confusion of infidelity in your marriage? As Lacy said, please know that you're not alone and that there is hope for healing and recovery. Please accept my gift of a free call, so you can talk with someone who knows what it feels like to struggle with the question, should I stay or leave after being cheated on? 

Ultimately, the decision to stay or leave should be based on what is best for you and your well-being and what will allow you to heal and move forward in the healthiest way possible. With support and by using proper self-care, you, like Lacy, can emerge from this experience even stronger and more resilient.

 I invite you to consider taking the self-care after infidelity course, designed explicitly for betrayed spouses like you. You can navigate the healing journey and move toward a brighter future with step-by-step guidance and support.

Please don't hesitate to reach out if you have any questions or want to discuss this further. I'm here to support you.

Much love

Yours on the Journey

You may also find these helpful:

Should I Leave After Being Cheated On?
Should I Stay or Go After Infidelity?
How to Feel Safe After Being Cheated On: A Betrayed Wife’s Guide
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About the Author

I am a certified life coach and relationship facilitator with a passion for supporting women who have been impacted by infidelity. Drawing on my personal experiences and deep insights, I am dedicated to helping my clients heal from the trauma of betrayal and reclaim their lives.

Through one-on-one coaching, I am committed to providing a safe, supportive space for women to process their emotions and move forward after infidelity. You can find me in my vegetable garden or taking long walks in nature with my dog when I'm not working. Read more about  the betrayed wife's personal infidelity story...